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Aging Hippie Dispatch

LIVEBLOGGING – Clown show – bring popcorn

by on Feb. 22, 2012, under Arizona, Catholic, Christian, Republican, santorum

 

 

 

Don’t forget the Repub Clown Parade tonight at 6 PM on CNN

(If you dont have cable it will be streamed live on CNN’s Web site)
The reviews and ratings so far show it to be the most entertaining sort-of-reality TV this year.

It will be moderated by John King, who in his last appearance was attacked (to great applause) by Newt for daring to ask about his open marriage arrangements.
Personally I think Newt should have handled it differently, pointing out that Callista would be the best First Lady having already defeated two opponents in the Primaries.

I think we can safely assume that all of the candidates – except perhaps Ron Paul – will come out firmly opposed to Satan. And probably only Gingrich will imply that Satan and President Obama are one and the same. And everyone will be too polite to mention Planet Kolob.

But what makes the “debates” so entertaining are not the candidates, but the audience, and tonight we are going to have an Arizona Tea Party audience !!!

So far we have been treated to cries of “let him die” for someone without health insurance, Boos for gay soldiers, and wild applause for executing a record number of people.

But I am certain that our Arizonans can top all previous audiences – we are Number One in sheer wingnuttyness.

So pop some popcorn and have a drink everytime little Ricky can’t figure out if he’s running for Pope or National Gynecologist.

And if you’re still sober afterwards, check out Dana Carvey’s Church Lady on Youtube to complete the experience.

GO ARIZONA !!!!!

 

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 22nd, 2012 at 12:02 pm and is filed under Arizona, Catholic, Christian, Republican, santorum. Tags for this post: , , , , . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

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  • David_Pinar

    I doubt it, just got back from a lovely long weekend at the hospital – appendicitis – and the stomach is still a little weak. That pic of Santorum was hard enough to take. 

  • Carolyn_Classen

    I couldn’t find the other CNN link above, but here’s the live one:
    http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/cvplive/cvpstream1.  Haven’t watched any of the others, but this one is here in Arizona.

    • tiponeill

      >
       Haven’t watched any of the others,

      You missed the funniest TV in years.
      But I have hopes for our local Teapartiers to be the teapartiest :)

      • Carolyn_Classen

        I’m watched the show right now, eating my popcorn.

  • tiponeill

    Ricky – Repeal Obama care, Cut Medicaid, Medicare, food stamps … poverty good
    Mittens – Ricky voted for Planned Parenthood
    Ricky – Romney raised taxes.
    Mittens – Congress should not raise debt ceiling - default.
    Newt – Let me read some history. Drill Baby Drill
    Grumpy – Ricky is a fake. Voted for NCLB. Wants to bomb Iran. Foreign Aid.

  • tiponeill

    Mittens gets first audience cheer – he empowered state police to go after illegal aliens. Also he supported Catholic Church discriminating against gays.
    Newt – Repeal Civil Service, close the Border (cheers)
    Ricky – My earmarks are good – their earmarks are bad.
    Mittens – Earmarks should be banned (except for the one I got for the Salt Lake Olympics). Ricky voted for Bridge to Nowhere (audience noise).
    Ricky - Mittens doesn’t know what he’s talking about ( boo). Grumpy is big earmarker.
    Newt – Professor snore.
    Grumpy – earmarks are confusing.

  • tiponeill

    King question Auto Bailout: 
    Ricky – let em go bankrupt. Says Mittens bails out Wall Street but not Autos.
    Mittens – When I said let em go bankrupt, what I meant was let them go bankrupt and then bail out what’s left. Says Ricky voted for bailout of Airlines and Steel.
    Mittens – I was both for and against auto bailout.
    Ricky – Apples are not oranges.
    Newt – it’s all the unions fault.
    (Michigan GM Workers must feel better now)
    King – the Bailouts worked.
    Grumpy – Bailouts make me grumpy. Free Markets.
    Commercial break

    • Carolyn_Classen

      So these are the Final Four Republican candidates for President — any prediction as to who may become the ultimate nominee to face off with President Obama?

      • tiponeill

        Mittens is my bet. I think they would have done best with Perry but I guess they figured that after shrub they couldn’t sell another texas illiterate.

  • tiponeill

    King – Birth Control
    Loud Boos
    Newt – Obama is a Baby Killer. Obstetricians should be executed.
    Mittens – Obama anti-christ wants government to attack churches
    Ricky: opposes birth control because too many children are born out of wedlock.
    (I kid you not)
    Grumpy – They are all sluts but it isn’t the pills fault.
    Mittens – even though I’m Mormon, I helped the Bishops fight birth control and discriminate against gays, I just did a bad job of it.
    Newt – we are at an abyss where we may not be able for government to control lady parts and gay people might get equal rights
    Grumpy – Defund Planned Parenthood (APPLAUSE)
    Ricky – I voted for Abstinence Education and no mention of lady parts.
    Grumpy – I wouldn’t vote for anything .

    Ricky – I voted both for and against Title 10 (Boo)

    Ricky – Mitt started Romneycare (boo). Government is bad and wants to control your lives  - that’s why I want control of your lady parts.

    Mittens – State government good, Federal government bad – thts why I’m running for federal office. I will repeal Obamacare. Ricky caused Obamacare because he supported Specter.

    Ricky; DID SO DID SO create Romneycare !!

    Mitt _ Ricky get into incomprehensible babble 

  • tiponeill

    Audience Question – Seal the border 

    Grumpy – mumble mumble 10th Amendment. Welfare State. Pakistan Border.

    Newt – I would build fence come high water or …..

    Loud applause for Sheriff Joe in audience.

    Mittens – will E verify and they will self deport. Oh yes – will build the fence too, even though they are gone.

    Ricky – Props up for Sheriff Joe

    King – is your rhetoric about hispanics harsh ?

    Newt – Obama cosies up to hispanics (applause)

  • tiponeill

    Popcorn break – so far very disappointed in our local tea parties. Little enthusiasm except for when old white men discuss lady parts. 
    Maybe if they hired illegals to build it, they could build the fence cheaply ?
    Rumour is that Mitt packed the audience

    Describe yourself in one word:

    Grumpy – consistent
    Ricky – courage
    Mitt – Resolute
    Newt – cheerful

    Question – Women serving in battle

    Mitt – No opinion – but Obama is bad, we need more bombs, ships, planes, non-gay soldiers.

    Newt – Obama is bad, social engineer (yaay). We are in more danger than civil war, Obama is bad. (yaay)

    Grumpy – don’t want to send anyone into battle, invading countries is bad (audience hate)

    Ricky – Lady parts need to be protected.

    Question – What to do about Iran ?

    Newt – Pre-emptive strike. Bomb em

    Mittens – Obama bad – hasn’t bombed them yet, hasn’t caused civil war, hasn’t used military options. If I’m President I will use military.

    Ricky – Me too. I’ve been wanting to go after Iran for years – I did it first. Obama bad.

    Grumpy – Iran is no threat (BOO). Going to war is reckless and risky. At least get a declaration of war (some applause). Sanctions bad, Obama bad.

    Question – Should we arm Syrian Rebellion ?

    Ricky – Obama bad. Mixed up Iran and Syria. More stuff, Need new President. Obama bad.Obama bad.

    Newt – Drill baby Drill. Obama bad.

    Mittens – Agree with whatever they said. Repubs are united being right, Obama bad. I know all about Alawites

    Grumpy – Wars cost money. Soviets went bankrupt in afghansitan ( Mixed cheer/boo)

  • tiponeill

    Question – No Child Left Behind.

    Ricky – I voted for it before I was against it.

    Mitt – My State ( in this case Massachusetts ) has great schools, all due to me (Democrats have nothing to do with it). Also unions bad.

    Newt – Feds out of public schools. States out of public schools. Repub babble. Fundamental rethinking.

    Grumpy – Feds out of education. (Applause).

    Popcorn break – severe disappointment. If they don’t get back to lady parts I may still be sober after this. Where did they get this audience.
    Arizona – you let me down.

  • tiponeill

    Last question – what is biggest misconception about you ?

    Grumpy – that I can’t win. Welcome to my reality.

    Newt – I was majority leader.

    Mittens – I don’t answer your questions, I am best leader. (applause)

    Ricky – I can win even though this rich guy sitting beside me outspent me 40 to one. 

    Arizona – I am very disappointed in you :(
    END

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