Rex Ryan and Jets put best foot forward in win over Pats
by Christopher C. Wuensch on Jan. 17, 2011, under Sports, Stranded At Second Base
STRANDED AT SECOND BASE“Culling the thoughts that occur when you’re standing around waiting for something to happen”
.
Rex Ryan is alleged to have a foot-fetish, after a video surfaced online of a woman, who looks like the wife of the New York Jets head coach, performing provocative acts with her feet.
This, of course, served as a new challenge for headline writers everywhere. With that said, here’s the Rex Ryan foot-related headline database:
New England Patriots fans prior to the AFC Divisional Playoff game against the New York Jets at Gillette Stadium. John MunsonThe Star-Ledger via US PRESSWIRE
“Lick ‘Em”
“No Foot in Mouth” (Albany Times Union)
“Rex Ryan: Agony of De-Feet” (Bleacher Report and about 8,000-plus according to Google)
“Tormented Rex Bares ‘Sole’ Over Kinky Feet Vids” (New York Post)
“Men Just Follow In Rex Ryan’s Footsteps” (Los Angeles Times)
“Trouble A-Foot” (Boston Herald)
“Open Mouth, Insert Foot” (Boston Globe)
“Foot-Bowl: Rex Ryan vs. Bill Belichick” (Larry Brown Sports)
“Jets, Pats Dance Around Wes Welker’s Foot Comments” (Sporting News)
“By The Skin of the Feet, Jets Sneak Past Colts” (Vigilant Sports)
.
Some additional ones the media missed, but In Progress At Press Time did not:
“Welker, Pats Shoot Selves in Foot”
“This Little Piggie Won in Foxborough, This Little Piggie Stays Home”
“Rex Ryan’s Dogs Are Barking, Pats Forced to Heel”
“Foxborough Phalanges: Jets Step on, break, Patriots Super Bowl Dreams”
“Brady, and His Fabio Haircut, Swept off his Feet”
“Welker, Dropped Touchdown Pass, Incon-sole-able After Loss”
.
Brett Favre’s sister Brandi was arrested this week as part of a bust on a Mississippi meth house.
Is this further proof that there’s just no quit in the Favre household?
.
If periods are called ‘quarters’ in football and basketball; how come they’re not called ‘thirds’ in hockey? Shouldn’t the Red Wings win a game with a late third-thirds goal by Detroit defenseman Nicklas Lidstrom?
.
New York Jets defensive lineman Shaun Ellis pins Tom Brady on the turf during Sunday's AFC playoffs to see if the New England Patriot quarterback is ticklish. Stew Milne - US PRESSWIRE
It’s an NFL tradition for opposing head coaches to shake hands after every game; but does that post-game tradition trickle down the roster? Do punters seek out the other punter?
One Punter to Another: “Hey, good leg out there today.”
.
The NFL announced its annual Punt, Pass and Kick competition winners before the fourth quarter of the Falcons-Packers game on Saturday in Atlanta.
If you’re anything like me, you only watch this with any interest because you want to see if the 15-year-old champion has a better mustache than yourself…which this year’s champ definitely does.
.
Peyton Manning’s early playoff exit means the Indianapolis Colts quarterback will have more time to devote to his quest to return to the Double Stuf Racing League. Is the elder Manning brother the fabled Double Stuf “Hooded Menace?”
.
Have you seen the price of mattresses lately? With costs at an all-time high and little regard for their customers, it’s a wonder how the CEO’s of bedding companies sleep at night.
.
I’ve been battling a flu-like cold since early November. It’s left me wheezing, sweating profusely and badly unshaven.
I’m calling it the ‘Joe Miller Virus.’
That’s right, I closed with an Alaskan gubernatorial joke.
