STRANDED AT SECOND BASE

“Culling the thoughts that occur when you’re standing around waiting for something to happen”

Manny Pacquiao, right, takes a punch from Miguel Cotto. Chris Cozzone/FightWireImages.com via US PRESSWIRE

Today is Boxing Day, the annual tradition where world-renown boxing champ Manny Pacquiao comes to your house and punches you in the solar plexus for giving him an ugly sweater for Christmas.

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Snow has forced the postponement of the second Minnesota Viking game in three weeks. Sunday’s game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Vikings has been moved to Tuesday night. Forgive the Vikes if they’re feeling a bit snake-bitten lately. Or is it frost-bitten?

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The Dallas Cowboys attempted a late-game Hail Mary pass on Saturday night, trailing 27-26 to the Arizona Cardinals. If there ever was a night where a Hail Mary seemed appropriate, it’s Christmas Night.

The Cowboys’ prayers, however, were not answered. Perhaps they should have put a “win” on their Christmas wish list.

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Not so good tidings exist in some basketball locker rooms these days, despite the air of holiday cheer.

Two reports have surfaced of teammates stuffing each other’s stockings with their fists on Thursday.

The first incident came in the stands between Renardo Sidney and Elgin Bailey of Mississippi State. The other came hours later when Washington Wizards teammates Andray Blatche and JaVale Mcgee.

In the spirit of the season, fellas, let’s move on and put these incidents behind us…and blame it on the eggnog.

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Can the NFL Network really call a Christmas night game played on Saturday as “Thursday Night Football?” Am I crazy or did I not just watch the Steelers beat the Panthers two nights ago on the same channel?

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Tom Brady, No. 12, points to his flowing hair beneath his helmet. David Butler II-US PRESSWIRE

How long before someone makes a serious reference to Tom Brady’s hair being his strength, a la the Biblical Samson.

Oh wait. According to Google, some 260,000 already have.

Interesting note about Samson: legend has it that he once slaughtered 1,000 Philistine men with just the mandible of a donkey. Let’s see Tom Brady do that.

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If I’m NFL Network analyst Randy Moss, I’m changing my handle to “Randall,” as not to be confused with curmudgeon Tennessee Titan wide receiver Randy Moss.

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“Culling the thoughts that occur when you’re standing around waiting for something to happen”

Thank the good lord for the genius who invented the little black bar.

That thin veil — the last line of defense between a naked body and a cold, shiver down the spine.

Fans of Brett Favre are seeing a lot more of the Minnesota Viking quarterback these days. Bruce Kluckholn - USPRESSWIRE

If there’s one thing many athletes lack, it’s shame. From Vlad Guerrero strutting nude in the Texas Ranger locker room to the high school wrestler who dons his brand new singlet on the first day of practice by dropping trou in the middle of the team’s wrestling room without hesitation or regard for the horrified sports reporter standing within eyeshot.

The Internet doesn’t have much use for black bars as athletes are innovating ways to take the nudity outside of the locker room.

Photos of Brett Favre — and allegedly of little Brett — are the latest to surface on the Internet.

The Minnesota Viking quarterback allegedly sent camera-phone pictures of his, for a lack of a funnier term, “junk” to then New York Jets Game Day host Jenn Sterger.

Here’s hoping the Vikes don’t call for any naked bootlegs on Monday night when they take on the Jets.

Some recent athletes that have gone ‘commando:’

*    If Tyler Thomas is in a beaver uniform this weekend, it won’t be of the Oregon State variety when OSU takes on the University of Arizona on the gridiron.

The offensive lineman was booted from the team in August after he was arrested on suspicion of criminal trespassing, criminal mischief and resisting arrest.

What? A guy can’t break into someone’s home with a liver soaked in booze and no clothes? Police allegedly took the belligerent Thomas down with tasers. They say the smell of burnt brisket still haunts that house.

*    Greg Cullen has found his clothes and a new job as defensive line coach for the Jacksonville Jaguars. Cullen, you may recall, was arrested after driving through a Wendy’s drive through in his birthday suit while coaching for the Detroit Lions. It’s a good thing for Cullen that in Jacksonville, he’s not very far from Paradise Valley Resort, a noted nudist hotspot in Northeast Georgia.

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