I’m not a frequent flyer these days, and the few trips that I have taken don’t make me yearn for another opportunity to fly any time soon.

The problem begins, and often ends, when checking airfares. Dinking around on Google can result in a wide array of posted ticket prices, but that’s merely the beginning of a final cost nightmare. While there have been some taxes on airline tickets for years, the current array of add-on charges will make your eyes glaze over and, if it was physically possible, cause steam to come out of your ears from frustration and outright agitation. Here are several examples of what the feds have now mandated for “up front” disclosure, but that doesn’t mean you’re gonna like them any more than you did when discovering them at the final stage of the process when payment is due: government excise tax, government segment fees, September 11th security fees, and airport passenger facility charges.

It used to be an easy proposition getting a non-stop flight to most major cities, but not these days. This is likely due in part because the feds have quietly “encouraged” airlines to segment their flight to accommodate the government segment fee. That’s right, every time that plane lands, even if you aren’t required to get off the plane, that fee is tacked onto the price of your ticket. But why? When I called several airlines the answers I got were essentially the same; “Because we’re required to charge it…” That answer was obviously directed by some government bureaucrat that probably flies on a private plane, not a commercial one.

And what the heck is a passenger facility charge?! Yes, it is as absurd as it implies; it’s a charge for the privilege of being able to access the inner sanctum of the airport, that magical area beyond the security checkpoint. I suppose in reality it’s an up front payment for the potential of being groped by a TSA agent who came to work in a bad mood.

Yep, things just keep getting better and easier when it comes to commercial air travel, and that pretty much explains why politicians will continue doing everything in their power to avoid using the same type of air transportation as the “commoners.,” commonly known as taxpayers. As usual, the joke is on us, but most of us aren’t laughing…