Thin is not in when it comes to dating, according to a poll taken by members of three online dating sites.

Dinner for two/Ryn Gargulinski

A hefty (excuse the pun) 85 percent of single guys said they simply adore heavier women.

Eighty percent of the men polled said the larger gals appreciate the attention more and are not as bitchy as their pin-thin counterparts; 69 percent of the guys said it’s what inside that matters; 54 percent said heavier women are better in bed; 13 percent said the rounder gals have more fun and 35 percent agreed with all of the above.

Nearly 80 percent of the guys said obese was OK, as long as he loved her.

On the flipside, 90 percent of women thought guys would find overweight women unattractive. Judging by the poll, they were way off the scale.

Go figure, pun definitely intended.

And the ladies, too, don’t mind if a guy has a few pounds to lose.

Nearly 88 percent of women polled said they feel protected by a bigger guy and “Yes, I love a teddy bear;” 74 percent said it would depend on how overweight he was but he better be healthy rather than a couch potato; and 30 percent of women wanted a guy who was fit and totally in shape.

We are not sure why the numbers don’t add up to 100 percent, unless folks were allowed to respond to more than one answer.

The sites that conducted the polls were Date.com, Matchmaker.com and Amor.com, and results were posted by parent company Avalanche, LLC.

What do you think?

Do prefer your date thin, muscular and fit or don’t you mind some extra pounds?

How many extra pounds are TOO many extra?

Since many of us are multimillionaires, we know we need to protect our assets against gold diggers and dates just looking to manipulate us out of our mansions and Jaguars.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.../Photo Ryn Gargulinski

It doesn’t usually apply to the first date, but once we start getting serious with someone, it’s time to sign a contract or two.

Prenuptial agreements are nothing new, but some of the newfangled marriage contracts, like one up for renewal between Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, are pretty heavy duty.

We all know Katie and Tom – it’s the couple with a kid named Suri who traipses around town in high heels at age 3.

Tom is also known as the dude who stands on things so he can be at least as tall as his wives while Katie is also known as the no-name actress who is now upset because she is obscured by Tom’s celebrity, albeit short, shadow.

Their contract is a doozey, according to Star magazine, the highly reputable tabloid that is more fun than The Enquirer but not as amusing as those that report on Bat Boy and alien babies (some in high heels).

The Star said some of the highlights of their 100-page contract include:

The Scientology bonus – Katie allegedly gets $250,000 per year for supporting the religion and reportedly wants an additional $500,000 bonus as a special thank you.

The clothing allowance – Katie reportedly wants an increase from her annual $750,000 to an annual $2 million.

The baby bonus – Katie allegedly received a $3 million “gift” when she had Suri in 2006 and has been offered an “additional offspring” incentive ever since. Tom is reportedly willing to increase the gift to $5 million with an additional $2 million if she conceives by 2011.

The tabloid also mentioned the bickering about the contract may be enough to put an end to their three-year union.

The way it sounds, Tom is essentially paying Katie to stay with him and breed.

And we are left with but one question: What’s love got to do with it?

What do you think?

Have you ever dated someone who was only after your money?

Have you dated someone just to get to their money?

Are contracts that include a baby bonus and money for supporting your spouse’s beliefs ridiculous or an ideal thing?

Would an annual $250,000 be enough for you to support Scientology?

Most of us would admit that choosing to date someone based solely on his or her wardrobe would be a tad superficial.

Would you be caught dead dating someone dressed like these folks?/Photo Ryn Gargulinski - edited to protect the innocent

Some of us may do it anyway.

Even if we never say a word about our date’s mode of dress, there still may be times we wish we could send them home for a change of clothing.

Halloween is a grand exception to the rule. I was quite proud to be seen with a guy dripping gore dressed as roadkill while he seemed fairly fond of my black demonic wings.

During the rest of the year, however, some outfits may cause us to pause.

I have never sent someone home to change, nor have I been asked to go do so myself – at least not from anywhere other than one stuffy office job I had.

Yet some less-than-spiffy duds may make us roll our eyes in revulsion.

On the flipside, it may be equally disgusting to try and shape our dates into our own mode of dressing if that doesn’t suit them. Folks who are not comfortable in what they are wearing tend to become self conscious, irritable and stooped over like a hunchback as they try to hide.

So is it better to let some style blunders go?

Certain folks may look “cute” when they wear sneakers with sundresses or suits, but it’s still pretty tacky to throw on your tennies with a tuxedo or ball gown.

The jury is still out on guys – or even gals – in fur. I’m a fur lover, faux fur of course, so I generally find it quite fetching. As long as he doesn’t show up in a big, lavender floor-length fur coat that made him look like a sickly Easter bunny or a pimp.

Gals dressed as a pimp’s counterpart, with too short, too tight and too revealing anything, also fall into the tacky category.

Guys should keep their flimsy white tank tops (aka “wife beaters”) beneath their shirts, just as gals should refrain from publicizing bra straps and lingerie. Unless, of course, you find parading around in either a fine fashion statement.

But there may be nothing worse than a date who shows up, even with a bouquet of flowers in hand, who is wearing a T-shirt that reads: “I’m with stupid.”

What do you think?

Do you try to shape the way your date dresses? If yes, how?

What’s the worst outfit you or someone you know has worn on a date?

Did you ever send a date home to change?

Would you pick your boyfriend over your dog? Your girlfriend over your boa constrictor?

Zola helped determine that one guy was a real jerk/Ryn Gargulinski

Whether we love animals or not, sometimes animals just don’t love us back – nor do our own pets always love our significant other. Or maybe the dude is allergic to dogs or the gal terrified of snakes.

When our pets don’t dig our dates, it could be a good way to gauge if someone is a jerk. If my dogs don’t like a guy, he is probably not worth hanging out with.

We have to give it some time, of course, as Sawyer and Phoebe usually don’t like anyone at first. Phoebe will growl and bark while Sawyer will go so far as to stick his head in a person’s face to gauge the person’s fear factor.

Those that don’t flinch get a second chance. Those that are afraid get menaced.

Those that dispense treats are usually quickly approved.

The most horrific pet fiasco in a relationship I can recall would have been a nightmare even without the pets. I owned Zola, an 11-pound miniature pincher, and was dating a dude we’ll call Ashol, who was about 6-feet-2 and more than 200 pounds.

He whined and whined when he claimed the dog bit him. I never saw the bite – or the blood – but I could tell Zola was none too fond of this dude.

Matters got worse when he brought over his cat. I don’t recall the cat ever being mean to me per se, but it was certainly mislabeled as a “housecat.”

The guy’s answer to a litter box was letting the cat crawl in and out through a bathroom window. Of course, he did not mention that until the cat moved into my place, clawed through a couple of screens and then proceeded to crap on the carpet in the corner anyway.

Ashol then claimed I was “seeing things” when I brought up the cat waste, which someone had attempted to clean up by smearing in an upward motion on the nearby wall.

When the cat then clawed at and popped my exercise ball, it was time for the dude to move.

In this particular case, the animals were very helpful in determining this guy was a jerk. But I think in this case, too, I could have figured that out soon enough on my own.

What do you think?

Have you had scary or negative encounters with your significant other’s pets?

Have your own pets hated someone you were dating?

Did you ever have to choose between your loved one and a beloved pet? Do tell!

We’ve all heard that real men don’t eat quiche – but I’m finding a good number of men don’t eat vegetables, either.

Radishes sure are pretty/Clovis garden Ryn Gargulinski

Sure, there may be a bunch of green-bean-eatin’ dudes out there, but I never seem to meet them. I end up dating guys who have a strong aversion to some, if not all, vegetables.

One extremist would go so far as to pick out even the smallest shard of parsley, thyme or rosemary that dared touch his food.

If it was green, it was out of there. By the time he was done scraping basil out of his spaghetti sauce, everyone else was long done eating, had gone home and were usually asleep for the night.

A middle-of-the-road man I know will eat only a few vegetables – and only if they are prepared a certain way.

His salads are a bed of lettuce and a few raw carrots. He won’t touch carrots if they are cooked and refers to cooked onions as “slimy worms.” He likes to do this while I’m eating them.

Most men I know absolutely, positively, horrifyingly despise broccoli.

I really don’t care what guys eat – as long as they don’t expect me to eat the same stuff. And as long as they don’t mock my own food choices, thank you, Mr. Slimy Worm.

Zucchini actually - gasp - flower/Clovis garden Ryn Gargulinski

Here are a few random theories as to why guys despise vegetables.

The guys think vegetables are prissy. After all, many veggies are leafy, colorful, pretty. Some even grow from flowers. Much too feminine.

Or maybe they grew up in a veggie-aversion household. Right after these dudes were told to play with trucks instead of dolls, perhaps someone added, “and never admit to liking vegetables.”

Perhaps they are stuck in a stereotype. “I’m a meat and potatoes man.”

They could be still rebelling, a leftover from early childhood. “Mom said to eat all my vegetables but, dangit, I’m going to the opposite.”

Please prove me wrong. And please let me know if any of you guys out there actually like broccoli – and will actually admit it.

Are veggies just too cutesy?/Ryn Gargulinski

What do you think?

Do men generally have an aversion to vegetables or did I just luck out meeting the chosen few?

What other strange eating habits have you noted in your dates, either men or women?

Tucson is full of single guys – but our fair city was stuck at No. 17 on a list of 36 when it comes to meeting them, according to a report in The Daily Beast.

Who said you can't find a "good catch" in Tucson?/Ryn Garguilnski

That put us above Detroit, but below San Francisco. We are soaring above last place El Paso but far removed from first place Atlanta.

The report rated cities of 500,000 or more based on the percentage of single men who were deemed a “good catch” with a four-year college degree and the number of places to meet them. So it factored in the number of gyms.

Being No. 17, which is nearly smack dab in the middle, is none too awful. Except Tucson was ranked right below Milwaukee. Jeffrey Dahmer prowled Milwaukee.

That doesn’t say much for Tucson.

On the plus side, the report did call Tucson “the quirkier Arizona metropolis,” which is a definite compliment, and noted a few other points:

Beast Analysis: Tucson….offers great Mexican food and Old West charm. Though there are plenty of single men here, this perennially sunny city may not be the hottest spot to find a date. The social scene outside of the University of Arizona campus is wanting, and U of A’s party-school reputation may not be far off the mark. According to our numbers, Tucson ranks low in education. Click here for Tucson’s slide show page.

And it also quoted a very fun dating blogger:

What the Locals Say: “Dating in Tucson is a total crapshoot. I’ve met everyone from self-absorbed political types to videogame-playing 40 year olds with moody artists and kooky archeologists in between.”—Ryn Gargulinski, blogger

I’ve definitely had more trouble with guys I dated in New Mexico and New York than I have in Tucson. Both places ranked below Tucson, with Albuquerque barely above the bottom at No. 31 and New York City clocking in at a paltry No. 24.

So far no dates from Tucson have stalked me or drained my bank account (knock wood). And I have yet to meet a guy like those in Milwaukee who may behead us and stick us in a freezer.

What do you think?

Where would you rate Tucson for meeting single guys – or gals? Why?

Where were your worst dating experiences?

Singles bars aren’t your only choice when it comes to meeting Mr. or Miss Right.

Jail cells are not ideal places to find Mr. or Miss Right/Ryn Gargulinski

In fact, some of those places may seem more like meat markets that can land you with a Mr. or Miss Really Wrong.

Some relationships blossom from friendships.

Others are the product of a chance meeting when you least expect it – like saying “Hi” to that cute guy or gal at a coffee shop or hot dog stand.

Work has increasingly become a place of romance, as more people are working longer hours and don’t really go anywhere else.

Some companies are also becoming less stringent on their dating rules. I recently worked in a place that had at least three married couples on board, all of whom had met at work.

But there also strategic places outside of work or chance happenings where you can be on the lookout for a potential date.

Following your passions, be it taking an art class or hanging out at javelina hunting lectures, will put you in the same room with others who share your interests. Some of those others may be single.

Following your survival instinct, that is, the need to eat, will put you at the supermarket. Other single folks need to eat, too. Note: please check out their cart to make sure they are not buying food for two before you make your move.

Following your heart is another option. If you volunteer for a good cause or attend events that support something about which you feel strongly, you may run into others with that same love of the cause. The love of the cause could extend to love of each other.

Where I’ve met cool people:
Internet
Poetry readings
Festivals and events
Dog parks and animal activity places

Where I’ve met creepy people:
Internet
Through mutual acquaintances (not friends, acquaintances)
When I used to write “Personal of the Week” for personal ads (I would call to interview them and, although not all were creepy, the creepy ones with names like “Sizzle Boy” would inevitably ask me out)
Courthouses

Where to meet cool yet creepy people or creepy people who may be kind of cool:
Internet
Midnight showing of Rocky Horror
Political rallies

My current beau and I first met online and then got to know each other through friendly e-mails before we even did that first date thing. Since we had shared our common interests before the date, we knew we’d both enjoy that terrific first date we had hunting bones and moseying through dilapidated houses and an ancient cemetery.

Once again, thanks to Carolyn Classen for the topic – and just wait until you read where she met her husband!

Where did you meet your significant other?

Where would you advise others to meet potential dates?

Where would you tell people never to go expecting to meet Mr. or Miss Right?

Dates can help either make or break a relationship – especially that ominous first date, which should be filled with fun, frivolity and some compelling conversation.

Take your date to a cemetery?/Ryn Gargulinski

One way to get all that is to break the traditional bounds and go for something unusual. Never mind the boring old bar or a traditional trek to the movies, try a first date that’s a bit freaky and you’ll really have some fun.

Freaky but fun date ideas:

Bone collecting –
Get yourself a garbage bag, an ATV to trek to remote desert areas and a good eye for blanched white cow parts and you’re set. Bone collecting is a very creative and interesting way to spend an afternoon, as long as you don’t go for bones that still have meat attached.
Conversation topics it creates: cattle, livestock, ants, buzzards, disease, dissection, what the heck you’ll do with the bones once you get them home.

Future artwork/Ryn Gargulinski

Cemetery hopping –
While this may, at a glance, seem morbid, it is actually fine to spend time honoring the dearly departed. Visiting a cemetery can mix a dash of history with a lot of culture as you observe how different folks chose to memorialize their dead.
Conversation topics it creates: life, death, mortality, belief or non-belief in an afterlife, family background, reincarnation, debate about who you were in a former life, if people can really come back as goats.

Ruins/Ryn Gargulinski

Ruin hunting –
Ruin hunting can be as elaborate as trekking to the Casa Grande Ruins for a three hour tour or simply scouring through an abandoned house that has a prominent “No Trespassing” sign. Ruin hunting, especially when you are defying a trespassing sign, gives you a rush of being in a secret, off-limits place that can be dangerous. The danger is enhanced when the abandoned house has a mere shard of a ceiling kept in place by a single nail and could topple and crush you at any moment.
Conversation topics it creates: ruins trigger the imagination – who lived here, why, what did they do for fun, how did they die, is the place haunted, did they keep any pets and did the pets wear tutus.

I was lucky enough to have an amazing first date that included all of the above. Yes, it was also an amazingly long first date, but with all those thrills it seemed like a millisecond.

Treasure amongst the ruins/Ryn Gargulinski

What do you think?

What was the finest date place you’ve been?

The worst?

Were any of your date destinations freaky or unusual?

Do tell!

The dating scene can make you scream, especially if it’s the tension-filled first date. You can blow all of that tension out of the water in a jiffy if you wreck the date on purpose. Here’s how.

1. Show up late, haggard and smelly. Top off the haggard look with something totally inappropriate, like a demon mask, a bikini top and boxers or bunny slippers (the bikini top and bunny slippers work especially well if you’re a guy).

Wear a demon mask on the first date for some real laughs/Ryn Gargulinski

2. Complain about everything the other person has planned. “Why do you want to go to the movies? Movies suck. All they do is make your feet stick to the soda-soaked floor.” If you were supposed to make the plans, either take the person to dinner at a corner hotdog stand or have absolutely nothing in store.

3. Engage in long, uncomfortable silences. Make sure to pock conversations with those horrible lulls that makes every first-dater squirm. If that doesn’t seem to get to the date, go for the opposite tactic.

4. Talk nonstop. This option is definitely best for a movie date, especially during the poignant scenes where you miss the whole plot if you’re not listening. For best effectiveness, make sure to choose subjects that are thoroughly disgusting, boring or only interest about two other people on earth. Good choices include: boil surgery, why Peoria is named Peoria or how miniature doll makers make miniature planted pots for miniature dollhouses.

5. Do gross things with your mouth. Ideal choices include cracking chewing gum, sucking your cheeks inward to produce horrible slurping noises or using your teeth to clean under your fingernails.

There are many other options, but these are more than enough to most likely scare away even the most tolerant guy or understanding gal. And I’ll bet the tips are also effective enough to insure you’ll not have any worries at all about getting a second date.

Rynski’s Dating Game will feature dating tips, tricks, topics and weirdo stories. Have some to share? Please e-mail rynski@tucsoncitizen.com

What’s the worst first date you’ve been on?

What’s the most creative way you’ve ditched a first date?

What’s the most disgusting thing you or someone else has ever done on a date?