You Gotta Laugh A Little, Cry A Little: Volume 1by Amy Glor on Apr. 27, 2012, under Check Out My Briefs
April 27, 2012
Jesse Kelly: Seriously?
So, there’s a Republican contender for the Congressional seat recently vacated by our beloved Gabrielle Giffords. Jesse Kelly, who gave Gabby a run for her money in the last election, has a pretty strong contingency. Unfortunately, he also has no clue.
Two Kelly statements jump off the page: “We have an unlimited supply of wealth in this nation,” he said. “Get the EPA out of the way. … It solves everything we need.” (Quote from AZCentral.com article here.)
Which is enough for me to write him off as a candidate. To write him off as a person it took a little more. According to the above article, Kelly has been encouraging voters to help him “finish the job” of taking back Gabby’s seat for the GOP.
Um… not cool, dude. NOT cool.
I adore Gabby, and have full faith in her recommended successor, Ron Barber — both of whom know firsthand exactly why gun violence is no laughing matter.
Canary’s Dead: What You’ll Never Know About the Mine Next Door
Lotta mines around Tucson. Lotta mines. Now, thanks to Governor Jan Brewer’s signing of the Polluter Protection Act, both you and I could be living next to a toxic sinkhole. A death trap that is actively — and legally — hiding its poisonous shenanigans. Oh, and if all of your hair and teeth fall out because of it? You can’t sue. This legislation is so very environmentally destructive that even the envoy of Satan, former Governor Fife Symington, once vetoed it. But Brewer seems to think its a famous idea. Wow.
All the Wrong People Are Unemployed: Lazy Bureaucrats Could Cost Workers Their Bennies
Apparently, the AZ legislature thinks filling out a little bit of paperwork just ain’t where the party’s at. Tell that to the thousands of Arizona workers who are poised to lose their unemployment benefits if our representatives refuse to lift their pencils. The unemployed know all too well how much fun it is to wade through the red-tape-and-snotty-attitude maze that is filing for government money. (While also looking for jobs in the worst economy since the Great Depression, btw.) But you’re right, lawmakers — those slackers obviously don’t deserve a break.
Daniel Patterson: Good Riddance
Just when I thought AZ politicians couldn’t be more of an embarrassment, along comes Daniel Patterson. Quitting his post moments before being ousted from the House of Representatives for being … well … a friggin’ train wreck, Patterson’s girlfriend still managed to out-class him by getting herself arrested on meth charges.
Listen, Danny boy, we’re used to taking “racist” flack from the entire nation over the parade of morons that is our state government, but you really pissed off some people by making Tucsonans look like trailer trash too. I’d stay out of the Golden Nugget for a while if I were you.
The NIMBY-hood Report: Overlay, Lady, Lay
You really don’t want to f*ck with West University folks. They voluntarily choose to buy homes in a demilitarized zone — ergo, they love a good fight. And the city council is their favorite frienemy. Which is why I, for one, am far from surprised that the Hatfields and McCoys are at it again.
The council is pushing redevelopment around the UA, while area homeowners are digging their heels in against the city’s plans. Advocates of the overlay say the redevelopment efforts will improve the area and often accuse its opponents of alarmism. Meanwhile, critics of the overlay say they’re just trying to save their historic neighborhood from a razing at the hands of profiteers.
Wherever the truth lies, the NIMBY-hooders have legitimate cause to be cheesed-off at the council this week. City council tossed out more than 12,000 petition signatures objecting to the overlay plans on a technicality — despite the fact that its own office had caused the error.
Dirty pool, man. Dirty pool.
Marco Rubio Hates Mexican People: And the Feeling Is Mutual
So the rich white guy might choose a hot-token minority running mate whose skin tone belies very little about his political views? Color me shocked. Despite Rubio’s abysmal reputation in regard to issues that Latino voters hold dear: immigration issues, health care, poverty, education … and on and on … presidential candidate Mitt Romney still seems to be wondering what brown can do for him. The main problem with this strategy is that Latino voters aren’t stupid. Unlike Romney, who apparently thinks Cuba and Mexico are the same thing.
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