KNOCK, KNOCK. WHO’S NOT THERE?

MAS supporters, apparently tired of disrupting meetings, decided to instead disrupt TUSD School Board members’ home lives.

The protesters hit the streets — in particular, the street where former board president Mark Stegeman lives.

The tactic, while daring, might have been more effective if they’d checked to make sure Stegeman was home first.

CHICK-FIL-AMBUSH

You’d have to have been living under a rock to miss the local Chick-Fil-A drama last month.

Which actually sounds preferable to being associated with this guy.

ROSEMONT MINEFIELD

Local environmentalists took one on the chin this summer, with the state seizing control of air permitting for Rosemont Mine.

Tucson advocacy group Center for Biological Diversity swung back hard, convincing the US Fish & Wildlife Service to protect the (aforementioned-mine-including) habitat of an endangered species of jaguar.

Which is wise. Past experience shows that a “Save the Endangered Snail” campaign just isn’t sexy enough to get federal backing.

Meet back here on Friday for the final lecture in our Summer Headlines 101 symposium.

Locally, Vocally is a humor site devoted to absurdist journalism. Which is something I just made up.

Gov. Jan Brewer issued an executive order Wednesday, denying drivers licenses and other state benefits to “deferred action” DREAM Act immigrants — in other words, people who were brought to the U.S. as children.

To qualify for “deferred action” status, applicants must meet a few criteria:
* Possess a high school diploma or GED, or be currently enrolled in school
* Have no serious criminal record
* Honorable military discharges only
* Have lived in US consistently since 1997

Seriously… what a bunch of scumbags. We should totally keep them down.

TUSD-ISGRACEFUL

A school psychologist who was fired from TUSD after she brought light to what she called “the mistreatment of children with special needs,” says that she has documentation suggesting that TUSD intentionally hid the resultant DOE Office of Civil Rights investigation from its school board.

Former board president, Dr. Mark Stegeman, says that district staff denied any OCR findings against TUSD when he asked them about it back in July.

Gee… I wonder why Stegeman quit.

IT’S NOT THE SAME, HUH?

Poet Javier Sicilia and his Caravan for Peace with Justice and Dignity passed through Tucson yesterday to promote awareness of the human element of the War on Drugs.

I jumped upon a few peace trains back in my poet days. And come to think of it, we were kind of protesting the War on Drugs… in a way.

Fortunately, I think Sicilia’s demonstrations will probably go down in history before mine.

Locally, Vocally’s “You’ve Gotta Laugh A Little” feature is satirical commentary intended to amuse savvy, discerning readers. So of course YOU love it, you genius.

K-E-L-L-Why? 

CD8 loser Jesse Kelly has dropped out of the race for CD2.

Aww, Jesse — was it something we said?

FRANK AND BEANS

GOP sweetheart Frank Antenori knows how to Tweet. To me, that’s the big news.

The fact that he thinks nothing was accomplished at the last Rio Nuevo board meeting doesn’t surprise me at all.

WELCOME TO THUNDERDOME

The TUSD board appointed Miguel Cuevas this week, after Mark Stegeman vacated the board presidency… again.

So. Yeah. Good luck with that, Miguel.

DUDE. NOT SWEET.

Here’s how it seems to have gone down:

Cop pulls over dude. Cop smells weed. Dude produces valid MM card and not-valid driver’s license. Cop really smells weed. Dude makes joke about weed stink in car before he gave half of it to his buddy. Cop arrests him, searches his car, and finds a bunch of weed. Dude goes to jail.

Moral of the story: Even a MM card can’t protect you from your own stupidity, dude.

Locally, Vocally’s “You Gotta Laugh A Little” feature is just good, clean, American smartmouthery. Don’t worry, I’ve already been grounded for it.