Today I debut a new Locally, Vocally feature: “Low Budget Theatrics”

Please turn off all other social media while you enjoy the show. Then turn it back on & forward this to everyone you know.

LOW BUDGET THEATRICS PRESENTS: THE BIG DEBATE

A, long, long time ago… in a fictional political district far, far away… two — oh, wait, three. Right. Three — imaginary candidates came together for a historic hypothetical debate.

Yoda – Democrat, Dagobah System

Prince Charming – Republican, Enchanted Kingdom

Timmy – Green Party, Colorado

Moderators — Mickey Mouse, Disneyland MEO; Nala — Future Queen of Pride Rock

Nala: “Prince Charming, we’re going to start with you. Many seniors are worried about losing their benefits. What would you say to reassure them?”

Prince Charming: “Silence wench, I must defend my honor without delay. Mine opponent is a scurvy knave, and hath cursed me through sorcery most foul.”

Nala: “Mr. Charming, please stay on point. What would you do to protect benefits?”

Prince C: “Ah, you piteous serf. Again your addled peasant wit turns to fantasies of mirth. Fret not, simpleton. Greater minds than yours are at play.”

Nala: Um… alright… Mr. Yoda, how do you feel about the Prince?

Yoda: “Wrong for the Federation is he. A disturbance in the force I feel.”

Nala: “Excuse me?”

Yoda: “Both ways have it you cannot.”

Timmy: “MEDICAID!”

Mickey: “Mr. Timmy, you have something to add?”

Timmy: “OCCUPY!”

Mickey: “Interesting point, Timmy. Prince Charming, what would you say to Mr. Timmy’s assertion?”

Prince C:  “You wretched dolt! Can you not see the devil before you? Mine assailant is clearly in league with witches! Mark my words; your mangy hide will soon feel the lash of his sorcerous machinations!

Mickey: “OK… well… Mr. Yoda, what is your position on renewable energy?”

Timmy: MEDICAID!

Mickey: “We’ll come to you next, Mr. Timmy. Yoda, please continue.”

Timmy: “medicaid.”

Yoda: “Harness our power to, look the light to must we.”

Mickey: “So you advocate increasing solar power?”

Yoda: “Mm?mMm?mM??mm.”

Mickey: “Uh… yeah. Mr. Charming? Would you focus on alternative fuels?”

Prince C:  “What an asinine proposition. When I am king, mine coffers shall outweigh the riches of a thousand sultans, for the breadth of my domain roils with untold bounty!!!

Nala: “Sure. Moving on. So, Mr. Yoda, what is your opinion of the government’s new health care program?”

Yoda: “Strong the force is young padawan in. Learn, alas, still much to.”

Prince C: “Nonsense! ‘Tis a fool’s errand to minister to the plagues of the unwashed. Let them eat cake.

Timmy: “MEDICAID!”

Nala:  Sigh. On another note… Your Highness, do you agree with campaign finance reform?

Prince C: “Alas, plebian, your feeble mind is indeed a treacherous demon. Shall you never tire of this preposterous anguish?

Timmy: “OCCUPY!”

Nala: I just can’t…

Mickey: I know. Take a minute. I’ll get this.

Mickey: “Ahem. Mr. Yoda… Your thoughts on finance reform?”

Yoda: “Trust the Dark Side you cannot. M!mMm!!mmM!m.”

Nala: “That’s it. I’m outta here.”

Mickey: “Find a happy place! Find a happy place!”

Timmy: “MEDICAID!”

 – CURTAIN –

*Locally, Vocally and Low Budget Theater are humorous commentary. Don’t over think it.