To help kids prepare for summer reading, A Children's House of Books owner Pat James is having a trading day where families can trade a can of food for a book.

Finding a cool spot to get lost in a good book is one of the best ways to survive a Tucson summer.

The “bookmarm,” as she calls herself, at A Children’s House of Books wants to connect Tucson kids with great reading to help beat the heat.

“I want to foster literacy in the community,” said retired teacher Pat James, owner of the children’s used book shop at 2624 N. First Ave.

James, who opened A Children’s House of Books six months ago, has transformed the spot into a charming, colorful hideaway, with children’s art on the walls. A brightly colored paper dragon, created by students at Miles Exploratory Learning Center, hangs from the ceiling.

There is a dress-up chest, vintage toys and about 5,000 books for children up to about age 13 to choose from. Nearly all are used. Some belonged to her children, now grown.

James wants to make it easy for children to get books. Families can trade in books or pay half the list price.

She is hosting Trading Day from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. May 22-23. Families can trade cans of food, to be donated to the Community Food Bank, for books.

“Bring in a can of food and get a book, or bring in a book and get a can of food,” James said.

James, who retired from Tucson Unified School District in 2004, also offers teaching resources.

She wanted to spread her love of reading to kids in the neighborhood. She offers story time at 11 a.m. Wednesdays and Saturdays, along with tutoring and special events.

“It’s very important for families to have books in the house and to be reading to children,” she said.

LIBRARY SUMMER READING KICKS OFF

Kids, teens and adults can join the free summer reading club at Pima County Public Library, winning prizes and taking part in hundreds of educational activities.

“Be Creative @ Your Library” runs May 21 through July 18.

The calendar of events is available at all branch libraries.

Children can pick up a free “Be Creative @ Your Library” game board at any branch and use the game board to keep track of how many hours they read. They can also log their minutes online at library.pima.gov.

For every six hours spent reading, children earn prizes. All those who read 24 hours by July 18 will receive a certificate and a ticket for four people to the Tucson Toros baseball game at Hi Corbett Field on July 26. Six hours of extra reading will earn the child a pass to Breakers Water Park and a free paperback book.

The reading program for teens, called “Rock a Book,” is open to ages 12 to 18. They can earn coupons for local businesses and other prizes for every 10 hours spent reading. Prizes include a $10 gift certificate to Bookmans and a backstage pass to the “Rock a Book” band finale, where they can watch bands in the Main Library’s garage. Teens can register online at library.pima.gov or go to their neighborhood library for details.

Adults can list, rate and review books online, earning chances in weekly drawings for $5 Bookmans’ credit slips. Those who read 20 hours will earn a reusable book bag and a pass with discounts to Pima County attractions. Those who read 30 hours by July 18 will be entered into a drawing for a $100 credit voucher at Bookmans.

Citizen file photo by RENEE BRACAMONTE

Pat James in her store, A Children's House of Books, 2624 N. First Ave. James sells children's books - mostly used - in her 6-month-old store.

James is a retired Tucson Unified School District Teacher. Many of the used books belonged to her own children.

———

IF YOU GO

What: Trading Day at A Children’s House of Books. Bring in a can of food and take home a book, or bring in books to trade

Where: 2624 N. First Ave.

When: 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. May 22-23

Price: free admission

Info: 822-8211

Question: My 8-year-old daughter has been making comments lately that she is “too fat.” Her weight is just fine, and her pediatrician and I have told her that. But she makes comments about needing to lose weight and how she shouldn’t eat anything that would make her “fatter.”

So many girls do end up with eating disorders and I am worried. How should I handle this?

Answer: Isn’t it too bad that little girls – or boys, for that matter – worry about being too fat at the tender age of 8?

Talk about social pressure. That pressure is primarily geared toward young women.

The best response that a mom or dad can make to an 8-year-old is, “Honey, you look fine to me, but it’s your call.”

You’re putting the proverbial tennis ball of life on her court.

What you can’t do is run the risk of overreacting to it. Most parents would come up with something like, “Melissa, why would you say something like that? You have a lovely, cute little shape.”

Don’t do that. Don’t deny the child’s self-perception, but don’t pay it off, either.

In other words, “Honey, if you want to feel that way, you go right ahead. But I have to tell you the truth. It doesn’t look like that to me.”

That has a sense of balance in the response. If you tend to overreact, you’re going to make that situation worse.

If your child continues to feel this way, it is worth a call to the pediatrician.

We see a plethora of cases of anorexia nervosa, where kids have myopic views.

The theme in that tragic disorder is perfectionism.

Don’t be a flaw picker, parents. When kids do well, tell them they did well. Say, “I’ll bet you’re proud of your effort.”

But don’t overdo things. Don’t be like most parents and hold that carrot out there, hoping they’ll jump a little higher.

If you create that scenario in your home, you will regret it.

Just a quick note about general nutrition. Kids do get obese. Kids are among the most out-of-shape generation in our history.

A reminder to every parent: You’re the one that brings the junk home, so be careful about what you bring home from the store.

If you have nutritious snacks around that aren’t laden with sugar and calories, chances are your child will do just fine.

Dr. Kevin Leman is a Tucson psychologist and author of more than 30 best-selling books, including “Have a New Kid by Friday.” E-mail questions to him at whatsupdoc@tucsoncitizen.com. Photo by Tom Spitz Photography

Is “A Midsummer Night’s Dream” your thing?

The Arizona Theatre Company is accepting applications for its Teen Critic Program. Selected students will learn how to write a professional-caliber theater review. They are invited to free opening night performances, where they will receive a press packet and get preferred press seating. They can participate in workshops and have their work professionally reviewed.

Students will write reviews to be published either in a school newspaper or online. Students who apply must be available to attend:

• “The Kite Runner,” Sept. 17

• “George is Dead,” Oct. 23

• “Ain’t Misbehavin’,” Dec. 4

• “[title of show]” (yes, this really is the title), Jan. 29

• “The Glass Menagerie,” March 5

• “The Second City Does Arizona, or Close But No Saguaro,” April 9

Applications received by May 30 will receive priority consideration. Applications are accepted through Aug. 24. To apply, go to www.aztheatreco.org/index.html? education_teencritic.html&1 or call 884-8210.

Three-digit temperatures have hit Tucson, making it an ideal time for the Salvation Army’s Operation Chill Out to begin.

The summer donation campaign for homeless people starts Wednesday.

“With the heat rising, more displaced and at-risk Tucsonans are going to find themselves needing important resources such as water and basic day-to-day items,” said Salvation Army spokeswoman Tamara McElwee.

To enhance this year’s efforts, the Salvation Army has teamed up with Walgreens and Naughton’s Plumbing, Heating and Cooling.

Walgreens locations throughout the city are hosting summer specials where customers can purchase select, tagged items found near the register that are donated to the Salvation Army.

Walgreens’ Sierra Vista store, which piloted the program, has seen about $100 worth of the tagged bottled water, soup, seasonal items and other goods donated each week.

People can also donate bottled water, hats, sunglasses, sunblock and lip balm by dropping them off at The Hospitality House, 1021 N. 11th Ave., or one of five Naughton’s locations:

• 1140 W. Prince Road

• 3940 W. Costco Drive

• 4226 S. Sixth Ave.

• 6062 E. Speedway Blvd.

• 8190 E. 22nd St.

Goldie Breeding, 86, tends a rose bush in her yard that produces magnificent pink blooms. It was an 80th birthday present from her family, and she gives roses to friends at church and people who are ill.

She survived the Great Depression, the deaths of two husbands and breast cancer.

Goldie Breeding, 86, is one self-sufficient woman.

But the economy has Breeding fearing for her independence. While she is able to manage her expenses by clipping coupons and hunting for bargains, Breeding worries that a new prescription for her spinal arthritis or any other expense might prohibit her from living on her own.

“Food is my big concern,” says Breeding, who lives on Social Security and a small pension. “It’s gotten so expensive. And if I have to go on medication, I don’t know what I would do. I’d probably have to sell and move in with someone.”

Breeding is lucky. She knows any of her six children would be happy for her to move in.

But she doesn’t want to leave the mobile home where she has lived since she retired in 1999 at age 75.

“I eat what I want to, I watch what I want to,” says the retired home health care nurse. “I want to remain independent as long as possible. My family needs privacy, and so do I.”

She worries about how the economy is hurting her older friends who have no one to turn to.

In recent years, Breeding, a Tucson resident since 1947, has received help with unexpected expenses from Pima Council on Aging.

After a knee replacement in 2003, the agency installed a ramp, so she would not have to walk the eight steps up to her mobile home.

PCOA built a new roof four years ago after a storm ripped off a portion. “My insurance wouldn’t cover the roof, and it’s so expensive to fix these old mobile homes,” she said.

The agency helped her get a bracelet that she can use to alert authorities if she falls and needs assistance. The spinal arthritis causes Breeding to easily lose her balance.

Each time, her family has made a donation to the agency, she said.

Breeding relies on Van Tran or her children for rides to the doctor, church or shopping. She shops at four grocery stores, looking for the best value.

Breeding, who was born in 1922, was one of nine children, seven who survived past childhood.

Her father developed typhoid fever in Missouri, and the family moved to Phoenix in 1926 when Goldie was 4. She has vivid memories of the Depression.

“We were fortunate to live on a dairy farm, so we had milk and vegetables,” she said.

She recalls a time when her family had no butter, having sold all the cream from the farm.

“Daddy was selling everything he could. Mama said we had to go downtown and sign up to get margarine. I didn’t know what that was.”

Her parents always managed.

“We were young and we didn’t realize how tough times were,” Breeding said. “Mama always had a pot of stew. She made good bread and we always had a pot of beans.”

Goldie married in 1939 at age 17. She and husband James had two children. But James died, leaving her a widow at age 22.

She remarried, and she and husband Herschell had four children. At age 50, Goldie was again widowed when Herschell died from a heart attack in 1971.

It was then she went to work for the first time, and loved the years she spent caring for others.

Breeding has six children, 14 grandchildren, 12 great-grandchildren and six great-great-grandchildren. “I’m so rich,” she said.

She predicts the economy will get worse before it gets better.

“I call it a depression,” she said. “I lived through one and that’s what it feels like to me.”

She turns to her faith in hard times, and hopes her prayers will be answered.

“I’m praying that this new president can turn things around, but he has a lot on his shoulders,” she said.

“Every night I pray for the United States to be back to where it was when I was raising children. I want Tucson to be back to the way it was.”

Breeding walks down a ramp for which the Pima Council on Aging helped find a builder when her right knee was replaced six years ago.

The Pima Council on Aging helped Breeding get a medical alert device that notifies authorities if she falls and needs assistance.

———

HELP FOR SENIORS

Pima Council on Aging provides services to seniors and their caregivers. It is the designated Area Agency on Aging and acts as a conduit, coordinating services for older adults through other local agencies.

Among the services provided are meal delivery and congregate meals; personal budgeting assistance; employment services; transportation; home repair and housekeeping; and personal care services.

For more information, call 790-7262 or go to pcoa.org.

Rebozos, the colorful, woven scarves that date back to the 1500s and have been featured in songs and poetry, are a symbol of Mexican culture.

Among the most famous aficionados of rebozos was Mexican painter Frida Kahlo.

The Tucson Museum of Art will celebrate the history of these eye-catching accessories at the “Festival de Rebozos, The Beautiful Shawls of Mexico,” from May 5-10.

The Latin American Art Patrons who support the museum will present the festival. Included is an educational program for schools, with presentations by Armandina Cruz, director of the Casa del Rebozo of Guadalajara, Mexico.

The week will culminate with two public events:

• A Gala Celebration of Music and Dance, 6 p.m. May 9, featuring Mexican appetizers and a program on the history of rebozos in music, poetry and dance. Mariachi Luz de Luna and Folklorico San Juan will perform. A fashion show demonstrating the ways to wear rebozos will be included. Tickets are $30 per person.

• Mother’s Day/Dia de las Madres family celebration, noon to 4 p.m. p.m. May 10. Families can bring in rebozos for evaluation and watch a master weaver demonstrate her craft.

There will be booths selling aguas frescas, churros and paletas, and a photo booth for a family portraits. Admission is free.

Both events will be at the museum, 140 N. Main Ave.

Rebozos can be woven in cotton, silk, cotton and silk or artisela rayon. Their long, narrow rectangular ends are knotted and fringed. The scarve can be worn as an everyday wrap or as a fashion accessory for evening wear.

Handmade rebozos will be for sale, with proceeds to benefit Latin American Art programs, exhibits and acquisitions at the museum.

For more information, call 624-2333.

Help Stamp Out Hunger by leaving a bag of nonperishible food by the mailbox Saturday.

The nation’s largest single-day food drive is organized by the National Association of Letter Carriers.

Food collected here will go to the Tucson Community Food Bank, which received more than 334,000 pounds of food from last year’s event.

Simply leave a bag of nonperishable food, such as canned meats, vegetables or soups; cereal; peanut butter; canned fruit; or canned tomato products next to the mailbox Saturday before the regular mail delivery time. Food should be in nonbreakable containers. Local letter carriers will collect donations and deliver them to the Community Food Bank.

The Food Bank also needs volunteers to help transfer collected food from the mail trucks to vans or to cover some routes and pick up donated food. For more information, call 622-0525 Ext. 204 or go online to communityfoodbank.com.

Question: I saw you speak in Ohio recently. My best friend and I have been reading “Have a New Kid by Friday.” I have learned quite a bit. I am waiting for one of my kids to “mess up,” so I can try something new.

My friend and her kids lived with us last year for a couple of months. My husband and I asked her to leave, mostly because her kids are out of control. I suggest that she try your methods, but she refuses. I think she worries it will make her look like a bad mom.

We spent some time together the other day, and she asked her 9-year-old son to put on his shoes five times. By the fifth time, she was screaming at him.

Then her 2-year-old son threw himself on the floor and started screaming because they were out of yogurt. Her reply was, “Let’s get something else to eat.” She said this repeatedly. He couldn’t even hear her over his own screaming fit.

And this was a good day for her and the kids.

Is there anything I can do? When I am with her kids, and she is not with us, I never have any problems.

I am at the point where I don’t want to be around her or her four kids when they are together. Should I just tell her that? Or should I continue nagging at her to try your suggestions?

Answer: The question is, do you want to keep her as a friend?

You could sit her down, and say, “I was thinking about your kids and how they do this or how they do that and how you respond. I wonder if you ever think you should handle it differently? This Leman guy has a take that when this happens, then that should happen.”

You could walk her through that scenario, but I think the bigger question is do you want a friend?

If you really want a friend, and you tell this woman her kids are out of control, she may not be your friend anymore. It’s like saying, “Hey, your kid is ugly.”

It sounds like you’ve had it anyway. I always say if all else fails, why not try telling the truth. Sometimes, the truth hurts.

So there is the direct approach: “When your kids come over, it’s just too much. Maybe it’s a weakness on my part, but I can’t handle it.” Then give her an example, perhaps the yogurt incident.

The other way is to limit the time you spend with her, Distance yourself. Sooner or later, she will ask what is wrong, and you can let her know.

But understand that if you tell her you cannot handle her and her kids, your friendship may be over.

Dr. Kevin Leman is a Tucson psychologist and author of more than 30 best-selling books, including “Have a New Kid by Friday.” E-mail questions to him at whatsupdoc@tucsoncitizen.com. Photo by Tom Spitz Photography.

Margaret Conway, a senior at Catalina Magnet High School, is this year’s winner of the Gary P. Durrenberger Memorial Scholarship.

The four-year scholarship is worth $2,000 per year.

An honor roll recipient, Conway competed at the 2008 Arizona Interscholastic Association’s state swimming and diving championships. She has been active in basketball and water polo, and was a student athletic trainer. A National Honor Society member, Conway is also active in her church, teaching Sunday school.

The Fifth Annual Gary P. Durrenberger Memorial Golf Tournament is set for May 15 at El Conquistador Golf & Tennis Club. Proceeds benefit the scholarship fund, which was founded by Charles and Laura Durrenberger after their son died in a car accident in 2004 at age 18, two weeks after graduating from Canyon del Oro High School.

Five scholarships have been awarded.

For more information, go to www.GolfForGary.org.

More than half of the nation’s population, 186.1 million people to be exact, live and breathe in communities with dangerously high levels of air pollution, new research shows.

Although there have been some improvements in the nation’s overall air health over the past decade, those gains are leveling out, said Janice E. Nolen, assistant vice president of national policy and advocacy at the lung association.

And recent measures that are not yet having an effect (but likely will) are counterbalanced by the world’s insatiable need for more electricity, she added.

“It’s not nearly the direction that we need to take,” Nolen said.

But there was good news for the residents of Fargo, N.D., which won the top spot as the nation’s cleanest city overall – the only one to pass the grade in all three categories of air pollution: ozone pollution, year-round particle pollution and short-term (24-hour) particle pollution.

Tucson was one of 17 other cities that ranked high in two of the three categories. Othere included: Billings, Mont.; Bismarck, N.D.; Cheyenne, Wyo.; Colorado Springs, Colo.; Farmington, N.M.; Ft. Collins, Colo.; Honolulu; Lincoln, Neb.; Midland-Odessa, Texas; Port St. Lucie, Fla.; Pueblo, Colo,; Redding, Calif.; Salinas, Calif.; San Luis Obispo, Calif.; Santa Fe-Espanola, N.M.; Sioux Falls, N.D.

Los Angeles is the nation’s dirtiest city, keeping the spot it has held for a decade now.

“It will likely remain on top of the most-polluted list for ozone for a long time, but they have made improvements,” Nolen said.

Other dirty cities for ozone: Bakersfield, Calif.; Visalia-Porterville, Calif.; Pittsburgh-New Castle, Pa.; and Fresno-Madera, Calif.

Eighty million more Americans (175 million) than last year live in areas with unacceptably high smog (ozone) levels too many days of the year.

Butch, Zack Levin's steer, peers out of a holding chute as Levin grooms him. After his bath, Butch escaped and played in a dirt pile on the Levin property. Butch, who was slaughtered this week, won reserve champion carcass at the Pima County Fair.

For eight months, most of Zack Levin’s free time has been spent with Bill and Butch.

He’s fed them, groomed them, trained them and cared for their needs.

And now, he has to say goodbye.

Bill and Butch are steers that Zack, a 15-year-old freshman at Sabino High School, has prepared to show at the Pima County Fair.

For six years, Zack has been a member of Littletown Ranchers 4-H Club, one of about 30 clubs in Pima County.

He’s matter-of-fact about letting these two guys go.

“It can be a little difficult, depending on how attached you get, but it’s not difficult for me at all,” Zack said.

His mom will be the one weeping when they send Bill off Saturday.

“Zack looks at the business of it more than the emotional attachment,” said Laura Levin, who was involved in 4-H in her youth.

Bill was shown Thursday and won third in his market class. Zack also won a blue ribbon for showmanship.

Bill will be sold Saturday at the Pima County Junior Livestock Auction at the fair.

Butch, whom Zack entered in the carcass category, was slaughtered earlier this week. He earned a reserve champion carcass award.

Since August, when he bought the two animals, Zack has spent about 15 hours a week caring for the steers, who lived on his grandparents’ property on the far Northeast Side. He often rode his bike before and after school to care for the animals.

Daily activities included training the hair coat by washing, combing and blow drying; walking Bill to get him used to it; working with his feet so he can place them during the show and feeding the animals sweet feed, corn, oats and Bermuda hay twice a day.

Judging is based on showmanship and the look of the finished steer.

Zack said steer and swine, which he raised previously, have distinct personalities. “They’re just like people. “They have emotions. They get mad. They plot their revenge. They cry.”

He said Bill is a bit unpredictable. “He’s nice when he wants to be.”

Bill, who weighs 1,060 pounds, is a bit small. But Zack hopes to get about $3 per pound at Saturday’s auction, which would pay for the purchase of the two steers. But the Levins are concerned the economy will result in lower prices at auction.

Animals often are sold to business owners like car dealer Jim Click, construction firms or companies including Bashas’ Supermarkets. Some donate the meat to charity.

In addition to showing the steer, Zack entered the photography and cooking competitions.

Last year, he won Best of Show for a photo he took of a bridge in Florence, Italy.

This year, he won two purple ribbons – outstanding – for photos, one of his dog, Charlie.

He also won a purple ribbon for his free-form apple tart and three blues – very good – for two varieties of cinnamon rolls and his crescent rolls.

Zack said he often cooks with his grandmother, Jan Levin.

He said he will consider farming and ranching in the future, but he’s not sure the market will be strong.

He is also considering starting his own restaurant or opening Zack’s Mustang Service, where he can work on his favorite car.

Laura Levin is happy her son chose to be involved in 4-H.

“It was a big thing for me when I was growing up,” she said. “I have to say 4-H is is one of the best things out there for kids. There’s so much to get involved with, and it teaches you responsibility.”

Zack said 4-H members occasionally get teased by other kids. But it doesn’t bother him.

“I enjoy how it helps with your leadership skills,” he said. “You learn a lot about animals and marketing and you build a lot of friendships. A lot of my family has done it, and it’s good to carry on.”

Tucson Citizen photo intern Heather Raftery contributed to this report.

Zack Levin, 15, wipes the dirt off of Butch, his 4-H fair steer. After Levin gave him a bath, Butch had escaped and played in a dirt pile on the Levin's property in east Tucson. Levin will be entering the steer at the Pima County Fair this week.

Zach with Bill, who placed third in his market group and won a blue ribbon for showmanship. Bill will be sold on Saturday.

———

IF YOU GO

What: Pima County Fair

When: Daily through Sunday. Main gate opens at noon Friday and 10 a.m. Saturday and Sunday. Closing time is from 11:30 p.m.-12:30 a.m.

Where: Pima County Fairgrounds, 11300 S. Houghton Road

Price: $7 general, $2 for ages 6-10, free to children 5 and younger. Parking is $5.

Info: 762-FAIR, pimacountyfair.com

———

LIVESTOCK AUCTION

Bill, who is one of about 55 steers shown at the Pima County Fair this year, will be auctioned Saturday.

Large animal stock will be auctioned at 11:45 a.m. The small animal stock auction is at 10:30 a.m. Sunday.

Both events take place under the Pima County Fair Ramada.

Animals will be on display throughout the weekend.

For more information on the auction, call Pat Selke at 749-3531.

PIMA COUNTY 4-H

For more information on getting involved, call 626-5161 or go to http://ag.arizona.edu/pima/4-h/ index.html.

Kick off Tucson Youth Week on Saturday at the Community Youth Recognition event.

At last year’s event, more than 3,200 youths were recognized for positive contributions to the community.

Among those recognized this year will be youths participating in Global Service Day. Through that effort, Tucson youths will work in group service projects throughout the city this weekend.

What: Tucson Youth Week Community Youth Recognition event

When: noon to 3 p.m. Saturday

Where: Himmel Park, 1000 N. Tucson Blvd., on the north side of the park

Price: free

Info: 624-7225 Ext.203

http://tucsonyouthweek.event interface.com/tucsonyouthweek/ index.cfm

April 24 is Sudden Infant Death Awareness Day, and parents are reminded to know the facts when it comes to keeping babies safe.

Sudden infant death syndrome is the leading cause of baby deaths, claiming the lives of more than 2,000 in their sleep each year.

The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends parents and caregivers:

• Place infants on their backs to sleep.

• Do not place your infant to sleep in your bed. Instead, bring the crib into your room until your baby is at least 6 months old.

• Make sure the crib has a firm mattress and avoid soft surfaces that could suffocate a baby. Remove blankets, bumpers, toys or pillows.

• Clothe your infant to keep him warm, but avoid too many layers or warm room temperatures.

• Offer your infant a pacifier. Studies have shown a lower rate of SIDS among infants who use them.

• Breast-feed your infant whenever possible: It decreases the likelihood of respiratory and gastrointestinal infections known to contribute to SIDS risk.

Young people can make an extraordinary impact at home, in their schools and in the community.

You can recognize a young person for acts of kindness and good work during Tucson Youth Week.

Ages 11-22 can be recognized for anything from baby-sitting siblings to helping a classmate with homework to volunteerism or activism.

Parents can recognize their children, and youths can submit the names of friends or themselves.

All youths will be acknowledged, and there is no limit to the number of names a person can submit. Last year, 3,200 youths were honored.

They will be recognized April 25 at Himmel Park, 1000 N. Tucson Blvd.

To recognize a youth, go online to tucsonyouthweek.eventinterface.com. For information, call 624-7225 Ext. 203.

Question: My 17-year-old son is a very active kid. He is in the middle of his baseball season, and he also plays basketball in the winter. In the fall, he plays football. He is involved in drama in school and is in his church youth group.

How do you know if your teenager is in too many activities? I know you talk about this a lot regarding younger kids, and how too many activities are not good.

But if he can manage it all, it seem to me like it should be OK at this age. What do you think?

Answer: Your son certainly is a busy guy.

With kids, one true sign of being involved in too many activities is a sudden drop in grades.

Is he getting enough sleep? Does he seem low on energy? These can be signs, as well.

It’s hard to balance all of those activities and school work. Kids can get overloaded, just like adults.

My advice in general is that activities inherently are not good for kids.

I know that sounds un-American, but quite frankly, they are not.

They dilute the bond between parents and children when kids are young, specifically children who are 3 to 6.

The smart parent, in my biased opinion, tries to adhere to the simple principle of one activity per kid per semester.

That will keep things within reason.

I am reminded of a chapter I have in one of my books, titled, “Help, I’m a cabbie, and my minivan isn’t even yellow.”

We shuttle kids from pillar to post, telling ourselves it’s good for kids. But quite frankly, too many activities are not.

At age 17, the die is already cast. It’s too late to turn back. He’s going to be off to college soon.

But an important message for him is one of moderation.

If he’s going to pull good grades in college, some activities could be good, but not too many. If your son is as busy in college as he is in high school, his grades are likely to suffer.

So like all things, help teach him how to know just how much is too much.

And for those parents with younger children, have fun together, kicking a soccer ball in the park instead of in formal 4-year-old soccer.

Instead of driving from dance to drama to karate, how about spending the evening at home, having dinner and discussing the day.

Spend time enjoying your kids, without all that crazy rushing around.

You’ll be glad you did.

Dr. Kevin Leman is a Tucson psychologist and author of more than 30 best-selling books, including “Have a New Kid by Friday.” Photo by Tom Spitz Photography.