The other day I was at a mall, something I rarely do, and would never be caught dead doing this time of year. However, I was doing a family member a favor and it meant going to a mall. The parking lot was crowded and people were being rather rude in hopes to get the perfect parking place. I saw one car almost plow down an elderly couple in order to get their car in the perfect place. Than once in the mall, the pushing and shoving really got me in the spirit. People looked stress, were not smiling, and tugging their screaming children who clearly did not want to be at the mall. At one point, I had rest and sooth my spirit. I found a little fence to lean on and discovered it was Santa’s house and it got me thinking…

Christmas is the time of year where I get to see people at their worst. Being a therapist, it is my busiest time of the year. People tend to be more stressed, more depressed and their anxiety is off the charts. Still, there is one thing that seems to calm people down and that is good old Saint Nick, Kris Kringle, Santa Claus if you will.

I loved leaning on the gate of Santa’s little palace at the mall. I thought it was great seeing Mrs. Clause there doting over the children. The kids were lined up in their dress clothes and shinny shoes, and bows and slicked back hair waiting to sit on Santa’s lap and have a picture taken. More important is the looks on the children’s face that reminds me that these kids really do believe in the magic of Santa.

Still my thoughts kept wondering how did Santa discover that he could see many children in a mall or department store? I had to find out, so I decided to spend some time researching how Santa discovered department stores. My answer came to me from R.H. Macy Co. They were the first department store to have an in-store Santa back in 1862.

Wait! There is a debate here. According to the Old World Farmer’s Almanac Brockton, there is documentation that James Edgar, a downtown merchant in Brockton, Massachusetts was the first to put on the red suite and strolled through his store surprising children back in 1890.  Macy’s says “No no no impossible.” They were the first to have a Santa. Still another source who has done the research says that Santa started to appear in stores the 1870′s.

It is difficult to pinpoint where did the  store Santa originate and who wore the Santa suit first. I suppose in reality it does not matter. Today there are thousands and thousands of Santa’s everywhere; in fact, there are even Yule and Santa schools that teach people how to be Santa. I would think one would have to go to school in order to represent Santa. After all, those who wear the Santa suit would need to know the names of all the reindeers, how he gets down the chimney, how does he cover so much ground in such a short time, and how many elves does he really have.

Neither here nor there, what we know today is that Santa in the Malls in a tradition for families and children all over the world. Kids believe in that magic. There is nothing that can put a smile on my face faster than seeing a child sitting on Santa’s lap.   Merry Christmas to everyone and to all a wonderful New Year.

When I decided to write this, I kept thinking about the smiles on children’s faces, and so I cannot complete this article without offering my deepest condolences to the people in Newtown, Connecticut.

I was talking recently with someone who grew up in the 80s, they had said growing up in the 80s was the best time.  Not Me. In fact, I giggled under my breath and thought, I was raised in the 60s and no one should ever say their decade was better than mine. Of course, I get that I am biased; I mean after all, no other decade had Woodstock, or the protest songs from Viet Nam. I get she had no clue about make love not war and tune in and drop out, or what flower power meant. I felt as bad for her as I am sure she felt for me, and it got me thinking…

I personally did not care for the 80s. I had graduated school in the mid 70s so by the time the 80s came, I felt set in my ways. I felt fortunate that I grew up in the time that I did for many reasons, but mainly for the people and the music.  We had real music in the 60s and early 70s. We had The Beatles, The Stones, The Who, Grateful Dead, Steppenwolf, Crosby Stills and Nash. I was not really one for Flock of Seagulls, Air Supply, Culture Club, Rick Springfield, Bananarama, New Edition, Debbie Gibson, Milli Vanilli or Hall & Oates. Though I will say I am glad the 80s gave us great music like The Pretenders, U2, Radiohead, INXS, The Police, and REM.

After doing some research of the 80s to see if I could possibly understand why she thought her decade was better than mine, and once I got past the high hair and the mullet, the 80s did give us some interesting things. Well, I cannot say fashion was one of them. Each decade gives us a variety of fashion do’s and don’ts but I have to say the 80s had a great deal of don’ts. Shoulder pads, leg warmers, parachute pants, sweaters around your neck, acid wash jeans, and neon colors where clearly some of the big don’ts. Oh sure in my day, it was the hippy look, jeans, tie dye, love beads, leather vest and yes we had poor fashion, we had polyester and that was about as gross as it got and go-go boots, which I confess I had a pair.

The 80s had interesting television as well. It is important to note that in the 80s television changed because cable TV was available and more people were turning off local network stations to tune into home box office material. Still, the 80s gave us Alf, Married with Children, 21 Jump Street, Cagney & Lacey, The Simpsons, The A-Team, Miami Vice, Moonlighting, The Cosby Show, Doogie Howser, Golden Girls, Hill Street Blues, L.A. Law, Wonder Years, MacGyver, St. Elsewhere , Magnum P.I. and Punky Brewster to name a few. Nighttime soaps made it big with as well, still, I longed for the shows I grew up with like Bewitched, Candid Camera, Get Smart, Gilligan’s Island, I Dream of Jeannie, Star Trek, The Twilight Zone, The Ed Sullivan Show and The Carol Burnett Show. Most of the time in the 80s, I simply did not watch much TV and played music or watched cable.

The 80s did give kids some fun toys and games such as Trivial Pursuit, Cabbage Patch Kids, Care Bears, The Koosh Ball, Pictionary, Rubik’s Cube, Glow Worms, Pound Puppies,  Rainbow bright, and Strawberry Shortcake were all products of the 80s. You could play with those while enjoying your favorite 80s foods like Jumpin Jack Cheese Doritos, Hostess Pudding Pies, Chocolate Cow, Bonkers, Pudding Roll-Ups, Giggles, Pudding Pops, Pop Rocks, and raisins thanks to the antics of The California Raisins.

In addition the 80s gave us slang like, No Duh, Tubular, Righteous, Take A Chill Pill, Gag Me With a Spoon, Totally, Gnarly, Radical, Totally Grody, I’m so sure, Like, oh my God and Psych. Who am I to judge slang of the times though I still say groovy cool and freaked out.

Despite some of the weird music, or the high hair or God forbid the Mullet, people who grew up in the 80s love their generation. They share with their children what Dirty Dancing was, or Pac Man, they tell them about Madonna as they watch Lady Gaga. I have come to the conclusion that every decade has its own magic and what was my magic in my time might not be your magic, but still, I am glad I did not grow up in the 80s.

With the election over many women are saying that they voted the way they did so they could keep their rights. Many women I have talked to said they did not want to go backwards. As a woman, I clearly did not want to regress back to the 50s and I as a woman was fully aware that music and women went hand in hand and it got me thinking…

Women had a huge say in the 50s and 60s when it came to music. Yes, we live in a nation where some people would like to see us barefoot, pregnant and unable to make decisions about our body parts or choices. The Donna Reed era is over though and more women are just saying no to staying at home and taking care of their husbands. Many of these women are fully aware how much they influenced music. How honored we should be that women not only crawled up the charts, they rocked the charts in a male dominated business.  Let’s face it, can you imagine Ricky Nelson singing Aretha Franklins’ Respect? NOT! Women actually helped change and shift the music of my culture of the 60s.

Where would music be without women? Patti Page, Connie Francis, Shirley Bassey, Etta James, The Bobbettes, Della Reese, Doris Day, Peggy Lee, Mary Ford, Sarah Vaughan, Wanda Jackson, Ella Fitzgerald and Billie Holiday were just some of the women of the 50s that made wonderful music seem effortless. Their voices were natural and clear and their vocal delivery was precise. These were the women that broke ground for women to create the music they did in the 60s.

They paved the way for females to enter the arena of songwriting like Carol King and Joni Mitchell. These women songwriters would rock the world with great songs. Carol King wrote I Feel the Earth Move, It’s Too Late, I Feel the Earth Move,  So Far Away, The Loco-Motion, (You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman, and hundreds more. Joni Mitchell wrote songs like Woodstock, Carrey, Both Sides Now, Help Me, and Big Yellow Taxi. I could not mention singer songwriters without mentioning Janis Ian who wrote and recorded Society’s Child and At Seventeen.

These brave singers of the 50s proved that a woman could make it in a man’s world. They showed that number one hits belonged to women as well as men. Girl groups like Diana Ross and the Supremes and Martha and the Vandellas topped the charts with hit after hit. Women that captured audiences with grace and style were wonderful singers like Dionne Warwick, Barbra Streisand, Dusty Springfield and Marianne Faithfull to name a very few.

Women not only showed us that their music was what emotions sounded like; they showed us that they could move our soul with Motown artists like Aretha Franklin and Gladys Knight. Momma Cass, Tina Turner, Grace Slick,  showed us a woman could rock and Janis Joplin not only showed us a woman could rock, she showed us a woman could rock just as good as a man.

How grateful I am that women still top the charts and have made the music world not a man’s business but a business for talented people no matter what sex or sexuality they are, what religion or color they are or what they personally believe in.  How amazed I am that women do not have to take steps backwards but we get to move forward and for many women, they will move forward through their music and songwriting. Therefore, my hat is off to the women who showed us that women and music do indeed go hand in hand and will continue to move forward.