Holiday cheer would certainly not be the same with the fine throng of holiday music that comes with it.

At least grandma didn't get run over by a motorcycle/Ryn Gargulinski

After all, if Christmas songs were not billowing through every grocery store, eatery and shopping outlet, we may actually forget we were in the midst of a holiday season.

I actually have not heard as much music as I used to during previous seasons. Perhaps it has something to do with the recession. Or it may have something to do with the fact that I barely leave the house.

I recall whole neighborhoods in New York City where holiday tunes were set up to blast through tinny speakers down an entire block.

That said, I have enough ammo to classify some of these songs into their proper categories:

Most annoying song:

Jingle Bells – By far the song most likely to drive you to drink, drugs or pulling a gun on yourself or someone else, this pretty little ditty can run through your head for weeks following the holiday season. It is annoying in all its variations, whether in English, French or with alternate lyrics about Batman smelling and Robin laying an egg.

Stupidest song:

Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer – It may have been funny the first time we heard it, or even remain funny to die-hard fans of Weird Al Yankovic. But hearing it again and again year after year not only makes us realize how dumb the song really is, but it also could be harmful to children’s fragile psyches.

Song most likely to run through your head until mid-February:

Feliz Navidad – It doesn’t matter if you neither know nor understand the lyrics, just the mention of the title will have this song bursting into your brain and repeating itself way past Groundhog Day.

Song that would make the best background music for a horror movie:

Holly Jolly Christmas – Just as the upbeat, happy tune of “Stuck in the Middle with You” plays during a scene where a guy gets his ear cut off in the movie “Reservoir Dogs,” this song would make a nice backdrop to a bloody massacre or dismemberment scene.

Crappiest song:

Twelve Days of Christmas – First off, no one wants half of the crappy gifts that are outlined in the song. What on earth are we supposed to do with 10 lords a leaping? And where would we store them after the holidays?

Secondly, the dang thing goes on and on in its unending litany. The song also has a number of versions with alternate lyrics, one fairly-known version in which the first day of Christmas gets the recipient a beer. There is also a lesser-known version where on the first day of Christmas, a woman’s poodles give to her “a backyard full of poopy.”

Sappiest Song:

Blue Christmas – Not only does this song make us weep at the thought of two loves stuck far apart for the holidays, but we weep because we know how truly awful Elvis had become in the years following this song.

Coolest song:

Just so you don’t think I’m a scrooge, I’m actually listing two songs as very cool Christmas music.

Little Drummer Boy – The deep, dark rhythm and the sweet story of a frail kid who gets a high honor is enough to melt anyone’s heart.

Do You Hear What I Hear – This one has the fun repeating vocals, not unlike a rousing round of Row Your Boat. I also like the fact that a lamb gets to talk.

–

Ryn Gargulinski is a poet, artist, performer and TucsonCitizen.com Ryngmaster who never sings in the shower but often screeches in public. Her column appears every Friday on Rynski’s Blogski. Her art, writing and more is at RynRules.com. E-mail rynski@tucsoncitizen.com.

What do you think?

Are there holiday carols you absolutely abhor or adore? Why?

Do you have a Motown or other speciality Christmas CD?

Many of us are suckers for a success story, and we can find one in a flash with Tom Moran.

This Brooklyn boy went from suicidal drunk to Daddy Rocker who just released his second album “Ain’t Gonna Give Up.”

Tom in front of Coney Island's Wonder Wheel/Daddy Rocker photo

Success didn’t come easy. The 44-year-old first had to ride the express train to hell and hit a bottom so low he needed to be scraped off it. And he’s not ashamed to admit some of the tough stuff he’s been through.

“I am so proud of my life and my past,” he said. “I can now help others through my music and by being an example to them.”

Although booze badgered him, bludgeoned him and eventually ruled his life, Moran didn’t even dig the taste of his first drink.

That drink came as a teen and he slowly slid into a life of beer and pining after girls who didn’t pine back. It got worse right after high school.

“That’s when I really got hooked on the juice,” he said.

Other than smashing a beer bottle outside his frequent hole-in-the-wall hangout called the Truck Stop, Moran didn’t get into much trouble drinking – at least on the outside.

Inside, he was dying.

Still in his early 20s, the Canarsie chap moved to upstate New York to live with his sister. But his “good buddy Weiser” came with him.

“I was lost for some time upstate and in my mind,” he said. Thoughts of suicide constantly trampled through his head. “My life was really nowhere. I really did not want to go on anymore with my useless life.”

Waking up was turmoil, pulling himself out of bed a major chore.

“Getting up the next morning was hard to do. After a night out, I remember getting up the next day and wishing I would die and the hangover had my head spinning.”

Moran finally sought help when his sister decided to quit her own drinking.

“I went where she went and got some help,” he said. “That was the best decision I ever made: getting help for my drinking.”

Falteringly at first, Moran finally embraced a life without alcohol – even when that life continued to fall apart.

Married and living in Gerritsen Beach, Moran was working as a teacher, which he still does, with 90 percent of his cash going to fixing up the couple’s refinanced house.

He decided to use the meager 10 percent to record his first album, “Starting Over.”

That may not be the main reason behind the divorce that followed – “She did complain a lot!” – but the result still left him as a single parent raising his son Jonathan.

Tom with son John/Daddy Rocker photo

Move over Budweiser, as his son, now 10, took over as the most important thing in his life.

“When he first called me dad, I lit up,” Daddy Rocker said. “When your kid calls you dad for the first time, it’s amazing and wonderful.”

Working with former drug and alcohol addicts in recovery programs, teaching physical education to special needs children and, of course, spreading his message through his music are near the top of his list, too.

Moran’s first album sold 12,000 copies – not bad for “an unusual bad boy turned good,” as he jokes.

His second album has just hit the market, and I’ve already picked out my three favorite tracks:

1. Kisses & Hugs – An oozy, bluesy tune that soothes, grooves and mentions Santa Claus a la Leonard Cohen.

2. No Big Deal – Rocking number that devotes a whole stanza to the joy of Jonathan, especially watching the Yankees-loving boy play baseball.

3. This Poor Boy – Sweet, soulful song asking for help being put back together.

Even with through the turmoil of depression, alcohol addiction, divorce and working as a teacher in NYC public schools, Moran’s music is uplifting and filled with hope.

It is also infused with a simple innocence that makes you smile, not to mention tap the steering wheel while driving.

Even though Moran no longer longs for death, he easily answered the question I asked about what he would want on his headstone as his final words:

To my son Jonathan: I love you.
Go Out and Enjoy Your Life
Love, Daddy
P.S. Daddy will always be with you.

Full disclosure: I’ve known Tom for about 10 years and he’s one of those sweet, supportive friends that can’t make you mad even if they try. (Tom – that doesn’t mean you should try.)

Check out his album, video and more on his website DaddyRocker.com

Tom gives special thanks to his publicist, DeAlan Wilson.

I’ll be playing some Daddy Rocker songs on my weekly webcast Friday at 4 p.m. (7 p.m. EST) at Party934.com.

My favorite promo shot - love the vest!/Daddy Rocker photo

Do you know someone who is a success story?

Maybe you are success story yourself?

Who inspires you?

Phoebe went hoarse from wildly barking at all the fireworks, but the rest of the July 4 weekend was dandy, in Tucson and beyond.

Agitated Phoebe/Photo Ryn Garguilnsk

Swapping, jamming:

More than just used clothing was on hand at the July 4 clothing swap at Congress Street’s Dinnerware Artspace. Tucson performer Kathleen Williamson jammed in one of the gallery’s front windows while others began dancing in the second one.

The only drawback about dancing in storefront windows is that it tends to attract ne’er-do-wells, like one guy on a bicycle who appeared to either want to bum a cigarette or make a drug deal. He continued to lurk outside to perhaps abduct a clothing swapper to steal their new clothes or slice the person’s throat and throw them in a quarry.

Kathleen Williamson/Photo Ryn Gargulinski

Window dancers musician Vicki Brown and Lotus Massage therapist Laura Keys/Photo Ryn Gargulinski

Feasting:

The coveted Mustard Belt stays in America, with Joey Chestnut of San Jose, Calif., winning the Nathans Famous Hotdog-Eating Contest for the third time. He scarfed down 68 dogs in the allotted 12 minutes, setting a new world record.

My highlight at the contest, which I used to cover when I lived in Brooklyn, was when one contestant puked after scarfing down the dogs. He was not disqualified, however, because he was able to suck it back in before it hit the table.

Nathans 2009/AP Photo

Those who prefer a lighter fare also had some feasting going on.

Vegetarian rodent/Photo Marcy Gargulinski

Painting:

Anyone who takes a cue from my dearly departed Grandma G knows holidays are the best time to do some work around the house. She used to clean her closet on Thanksgiving. She also used to buy cat food just to get the rebates even though she didn’t have a cat. In her honor, I often try to do a holiday home project, with this July 4 leading to the repainting of the patio and its furniture.

Jazzy patio/Photo and jazz by Ryn Gargulinski

Revamped patio chair/Photo and chair decor by Ryn Gargulinski

Decking out chickens:

Meanwhile, back in Michigan, mom’s Mother’s Day chicken and dad’s Father’s Day duck got into the patriotic spirit. Dad at first denied having anything to do with this dressing up of inanimate objects, but we later learned he was the one who went out to buy the ribbon.

Cheery chicken/Photo Marcy Gargulinski

Ducky duck/Photo Marcy Gargulinski

How did your holiday weekend compare?

Did you paint your house? Swap clothing? Vomit hotdogs?

Sick of the homeless folks lurking about the wash, river walk and park?

Then do something about it.

No, you don’t have to open your bedroom to total strangers, but you can help by attending a fundraising benefit concert and art auction at the Center for Creative Chaos.

The event runs from 5:30 to 9:30 p.m. on June 29 at the Z Mansion, 288 N. Church Ave.

It’s $5 to get in, but you get a lot for that five bucks, like a performance by the coolest man standing, Black Man Clay, who is one of four musical acts scheduled for the event.

Black Man Clay is a riot/File photo Francisco Medina

You can also join a raffle to win New Mexico artist Sarah Smith’s Day of the Dead art or bid on other art that is part of the silent auction that starts June 26 through 29.

A news release from the Center adds more info:

The Center for Creative Chaos educates the public on the reality of the conditions of homelessness and poverty through video and advocacy activities. You can help support their mission by attending this summer event filled with music, art, refreshments and conversation. Recent video projects provide an intimate glimpse at homeless people that most of us never encounter.

Even if you can’t make the June 29 event, you can help the homeless through the Center in other ways. Every other Saturday at noon the Center conducts a Feed The Homeless Project at Santa Rita Park, Third Avenue and 22nd Street. The release notes:

You can participate by donating sandwiches, prepared lunches, pizza, hamburgers, soda, water, juices, clothing, blankets, toiletries or anything that you figure that people that don’t have anything can use. Or you can help enliven their lives by listening to their stories and communicating with them.

The Center for Creative Chaos is at:
739 N. Fourth Ave. (next to the Epic Cafe), 623-9061
Regular gallery hours are 1 to 8 p.m., Mon. through Wed.
Website: http://companies.to/thecenterforcreativechaos/

The Center for Creative Chaos is under the fiscal sponsorship of Pan Left Productions http://panleft.org/. Tax free donations can be made through Pan Left by indicating the Center for Creative Chaos.

Photo Ryn Gargulinski

Do you help the homeless?
Have you ever been homeless?
Have you ever been helped?