Four Self-Help Books for Valentine’s Weekby Larry Cox on Feb. 13, 2013, under Uncategorized
A note to my readers — I have been absent from the pages since early December. On December 7th, a date which will live infamy for a number of reasons, I had an accident that shattered my shoulder in five places and punctured a lung. With help, I slowly began my recovery. Due to my injuries, it wasn’t easy. I had to re-learn such basic tasks as putting on socks, taking showers and taking care of myself. It is amazing how many things you do without even thinking about it that require two hands. I am getting better and am now back in the saddle with a little help from my BFF — ibuprofen.
How to Create Chemistry With Anyone: 75 Ways to Spark It Fast…and Make it Last by Leil Lowndes (Da Capo, $16)
Just a glance from a certain someone can perk your coffee. Love is one of the most fundamental human needs but making or keeping that special connection is rarely easy to do. Leil Lowndes is one of today’s are translated into nineteen languages. Based in New York City, she points out in her latest book that chemistry is essential in nearly every relationship. Chemistry helps lead to passion, love and commitment. The secret, of course, is how to achieve it.
Her book features seventy-five simple communication strategies and techniques. For example, by recognizing the neurological, chemical, and evolutionary forces controlling love, avoiding the pattern of ‘perceived love’ with the wrong person, and sparking chemistry in a conversation, online, on a first date or for the countless time, you can help your connection with another person grow and thrive. In short, this is a practical guide to getting the love you want.
Manology: Secrets of Your Man’s Mind Revealed by Tyrese Gibson and Rev Run (Touchstone/Simon & Schuster, $24.99)
Tyrese Gilson, the multi-platinum and Grammy nominated R&B artist, and Rev Run, one of the founding members of the pioneering hip-hop group, Run-D.M.C., build a strong case that the bold truth isn’t always pretty but it’s better than living a lie. Their new book serves up a bold, honest, and uncensored look into the male mind and offers real guidance on how to build healthy relationships. If you are in a relationship and have difficulty sleeping at night as you ponder such questions as can I trust my partner, is he thinking about cheating on me, why won’t he put a ring on my finger and what on earth is going through his head, some of the answers might be found in this n-holds-barred book.
The knowledge on what it takes to make a marriage work might be uncomfortable reading at times but this straight-talk on the single man’s mindset might just help take control of your love life and better understand the man who complicates it.
How We Love Now: Women Talk About Intimacy After 50 by Suzanne Braun Levine (Plume, $16)
A number of years ago, a neighbor, a woman in her 70s, married a long-term friend. When asked what possessed her to get married, she didn’t miss a beat. She smiled and said, “for the sex.” Indeed.
Suzanne Braun Levine has written a book that shares stories that women over 50 have shared concerning their intimate experiences. “How We Love Now” is Levine’s third book that focuses on what she calls women in second childhood, roughly the period between the ages of fifty to seventy-five. She points out that women who fall into this category, love more deeply and with less judgment as they discover that having a healthy sex life makes them feel adult, authentic and exhilarated — not old.
In short, this breezy guide reveals that love is only limited by our imagination and our circumstances. The time has come to celebrate the possibilities of love.
Making Habits, Breaking Habits: Why We Do Things, Why We Don’t, and How to Make Any Change Stick by Jeremy Dean (Da Capo, $26)
All of us have a rat’s nest of bad habits lurking in the lazy and dark corners of our lives. It might be snacking in the middle of the night, having just another cigarette, maybe putting off the things we should do. Psychologist Jeremy Dean, founder of the popular website PsyBlog, explores the anatomy of habit-forming behavior as he offers tips and solutions for those who have been unsuccessful at making positive changes and stick to them.
It isn’t easy to break old habits, especially when they have been reinforced. He suggests when trying to formulate new habits, start small and, if the process works, run it again for additional habits you want to establish. Repeat the good habit as often as possible. Create a strong link between a specific situation and an action. Foe example, if you have decided to eat healthier, think, “If I want a snack, I will beat a fruit or vegetable.” Each time you do this, it will become easier and more natural.