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Humor: Hard times at Playboy

Playboy closed its New York office to cut costs and centralize operations in Chicago. Hugh Hefner put the mansion he owns next to the Playboy Mansion up for sale. They could cut the clothing allowance, but it wouldn’t save much.

Mexico’s drug cartels were reported to be diversifying their operations on the border. They are moving into the lucrative field of human smuggling. You can’t believe how much corporate executives will pay for safe passage out of this country.

President Obama met with the Soviet Union’s final president, Mikhail Gorbachev, in Washington, D.C. There was a hint of the old Cold War tension in the room. Gorbachev wants royalties for Obama’s economic plan or he’s going to sue for plagiarism.

Madagascar had a coup in which the president of the Indian Ocean nation was overthrown by a radio announcer. A disc jockey overthrew a president. In his first national broadcast, he abolished parliament and gave a weather and traffic report.

Sen. Chris Dodd was caught covering for the White House when he said he didn’t know who inserted the AIG bailouts in the stimulus bill. He admitted the next day that he inserted it himself under administration pressure. He was spinning so fast and so hard that storm chasers were following him with cars and video cameras.

Argus Hamilton is host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. E-mail: argus@argushamilton.com

Citizen Online Archive, 2006-2009

This archive contains all the stories that appeared on the Tucson Citizen's website from mid-2006 to June 1, 2009.

In 2010, a power surge fried a server that contained all of videos linked to dozens of stories in this archive. Also, a server that contained all of the databases for dozens of stories was accidentally erased, so all of those links are broken as well. However, all of the text and photos that accompanied some stories have been preserved.

For all of the stories that were archived by the Tucson Citizen newspaper's library in a digital archive between 1993 and 2009, go to Morgue Part 2

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